Monday, August 30, 2010


Wow. Today was amazing. I cannot even begin to put into words how wonderful my birthday was.

Basically it was perfect. Not too much. Not too little. Just enough to feel loved, special, and get EXACTLY what I wanted.

My bosses gave me 100 dollars! SAY WHAT! Being a nanny definitely has it's perks.

After work I got ready for dinner. I wore my favorite skirt. It's pink, red, white, with a dash of army green. Floral. High waist. Dreamy.

My hair was magical today. Thank you hair muses.

Kyle took me to a fancy schmancy restaurant. Maximilien over Pike Place Market. We ate french food while looking at the sun set on Puget Sound. It's voted the most romantic restaurant in Seattle for a reason : )

We got home and Kyle set up a scavenger hunt for me. He usually does this. The theme was photographs. There were clues on back.

One clue involved blowing out candles and eating birthday cake. This was Kyle's first time ever making a cake. So sweet.

Then the next clue led me to the most amazing present I have ever received in my life. I have been wanting one so badly for about 3 years. I can't believe I actually got it. My heart leaped out of my chest and I realized I am such a lucky girl. My husband is the greatest.

I got a Nikon DSLR camera!!!!!!!!

best day ever.
p.s. thanks to everyone for all of the birthday wishes via text, facebook, calls, etc. It's good to feel the love : )

Thursday, August 19, 2010

summer reading

Summer is meant for consuming mass quantities of books. This has always been the case for me ever since I was a little girl. My mom would buy a book each time I finished one. I would read everywhere. I can never stay in one spot reading for too long. 

Too much noise
Maybe a bit uncomfortable
Too much bright sunlight
Food and bathroom breaks

Sometimes my summer days were broken up this way. I would wake up and read in bed. Decide I was hungry and scarf down a bowl of cereal so I could return to my book.  I would sit in a chair outside letting my body warm up with the earth as the sun rose. 

Eventually it would get so bright and hot I could no longer stand it. I would rush inside, barely used to the light change. Do you know that feeling? After you have been out in the bright sunlight and then you move into a dim room. You feel kinda funny and everything looks weird. Maybe that's just me. 

Anyways this is how my summer days went. Of course I would go swimming, to camp, stay at a friends house, regular summer stuff. But some of my favorite memories were reading for an entire day. Late into the night. Not being able to put my book down and then being a little upset when it finished.

Well this summer has been a record breaker for reading. Except I don't get my childhood laziness with it. In this past week I have read 5 books. It seems currently I cannot get enough of books. My whole body and mind dives into characters and places that are not my own. Of course I always seem to put myself into each book. Each one relates to me in it's own way. Maybe a similar situation. Maybe they are fulfilling a dream I have. 

This is why I was an English major. I just love reading and thinking about books. Forget writing big papers about them. I just want to talk about them and analyze how each reader views a book differently. 

So if you need a recommendation just ask. I can just dig through my trunk which is acting as my library currently. 

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

coming around and ten things i love

So it's been awhile. I have had my reasons for taking a break from blogging. Mainly because the things I was going through put a damper on my desire to do just about anything.

It has been a hard month. I got really depressed. It was the worst state i have ever recognized myself in.

I knew i needed the atonement. that comforting, cleansing power that makes you feel whole, complete. I prayed and prayed to have that peace again. I was getting frustrated. really frustrated. I couldn't understand why it wasn't working like it had before.

I prayed and reflected, over and over. Finally I came to a realization. I was preventing the healing power. How?

I had trapped myself in a cycle of selfishness. I wasn't accepting the blessings i was being given. I continually wished for something else, something different than my own life.

In one of the most beautiful prayers of my life I accepted myself and all that comes with me. I accepted the wonderful blessings I had been given. As I did I recognized my need to change and grow. As this occured, I felt that peace descend upon me and it felt so wonderful. I went to bed happy, woke up happy, continued to be happy. All those issues I was dragging around were weighing me down. As I decided to accept them within my life, they were lifted from my shoulders.

Oh I feel good. OH SO GOOD!!!!

I decided to create a list of ten things that I am so grateful for and that I LOVE!

1. the gospel. It gives me so much perspective and hope even when I am having hard times. It helps me to know what I can do when I have hard times. Without fail the gospel is true.
2. my husband. This boy is amazing. He is my everything. He stood by me and tried to understand my feelings. He gave me space when I asked for it. He sees what I can be and will not let me give up on myself. I am truly lucky.
3. sealing power. I was sealed to my husband in the temple and this sealing has given so much power to our relationship. We are stronger because of the promises we have made to each other and to God.
4. the scriptures. They brought the spirit when I needed it most. They showed me hope when life seemed really bleak.
5. my friends. Friends are few and far between currently. But those that are around I feel so blessed to have in my life.
6. my family. I know they are there for me and I love them for that.
7. summer. Lately Seattle weather has been so good to me. I needed the sunshine this week. I needed it to warm my heart and soul.
8. Nannying. Nannying has been exhausting but so wonderful. Isabella is the bright spot on my day.
9.the Savior. I have felt his love for me, I understand a little more of the pain he felt when he suffered in Gethsemane, I know he lives.
10. the atonement. There are no words for this blessing in my life. I am eternally grateful for the knowledge of the atonement. That it not only cleanses our sins from us but brings healing and comfort when we are in pain. I am grateful for the sacrifice of my Savior and for all he went through for me and you. I am grateful for this learning experience to more fully understand how the atonement works and our role in letting it truly heal us.

p.s. my birthday is August 30th....I have no idea what to expect this year....