Once my grandmother Bebis (my mother's mother) was trying to reach a box in her closet which was on the top shelf. It was too high. She was talking to me and getting increasingly frustrated as she attempted to get this box. She reached a point where she lowered her heels back to the floor and counted to ten. She then reached up and grabbed the box so easily. She looked at me and said,
"Nothing is impossible as long as we count to ten. When we count to ten all fear, frustration, negativity leaves us. Then we can think clearly and see what we need to do."
I don't know if those were the exact words. But I know it was along those lines. Count to ten=surmounting what seems impossible.
I count to ten quite a bit. Her insightful thought enters my mind when I am upset, confused, frustrated, sad, and wishing for an answer. It is like her voice pops into my mind. Count to ten.
Count to ten.
one. two. three. four. five. six. seven. eight. nine. ten.
I breathe a sigh of relief. Because my mind is clear and I see my backward thinking. I see how Satan is trying to trick me.
How amazing it is that sometimes we need something to kick us out of our awful state of mind. Sometimes we get so wrapped up in our problems, our mixed up world, that we forget there is an eternal perspective.
I need to write about my life.
I need to write about who I was, and the process of becoming who I am. This happens partly in this space. But I need to physically write it out. I need to analyze it. I need to try to explain to others how their entire life is a preparation for who they will become.
It is hard to analyze your own life.
For now I will count to ten and try with all my might to overcome my weaknesses.